Well.
It's July now, and I haven't written like I've wanted to for a long time. Deepest apologies. In writing an email to my professor today, I thought perhaps writing in here would allow me to free up some of the space in my mind that is completely occupied by all the things that take over it's life.
So, here we go...in my best list form ever.
1. Getting a job is hard. It's hard not to be discouraged and frustrated. I know that I'm good in the classroom, problem is, I like history -- so do lots of other people. That and a lot of it comes down to having connections in the right places, and I am yet to find that. I spend a lot of time wondering what I'm going to do if I don't get a teaching job. Subbing is completely not my favorite thought as I feel like it would deeply depress me not to have my own set of kids to mold into fine people. That said, it's a job (and turns out, when you live on your own and stuff, you have to pay for all your own stuff...go figure) and it's a way in.
2. I hate/love summer.
I love that I have time to get things done.
I hate that I don't take advantage of it.
3. I spend a lot of time thinking about my kids still. I wonder what they're up to, and enjoy the connections that have been maintained. I wonder what they'll all turn out to be like, and what their future holds for them. Seems that not-so-many years ago I was sitting up in my high school history classroom, or running around the lacrosse field or the band parking lot - and in 8ish years, I have come a long way. I've made some huge life decisions, met three people who changed my life for the better and am on my way to doing something great. The thought that scares/excites me....the amount of kids that I'm teaching is going to multiply endlessly over my lifetime. The chances that I'll run into one of them at the store, when I'm out for dinner, or at the ballgame increase exponentially all the time.
4. I like middle school kids, too.
This is something that I never really thought I'd say.
I would be 99% as happy in a middle school as I would be a high school. Middle school kids are messed up too...and don't hate school quite as much. Sure their intellectual capabilities aren't quite as high, but between drawings of Beavers and Patrick Henry, one of my best friends and I managed to be rather intellectual and creative. Evidence of this sits in my basement in the form of our Favorite students' bill of rights.
5. I don't know where I want to be. I applied for a job up in the mountains, and after a visit up there this past weekend, I was eternally disappointed that they didn't want to even talk to me...as I think I would have loved it up there. However, there are things about the front range all up and down that I find exciting and I often find myself saying "okay, this is where I want to be...for sure!" and then a week later, changing my mind, and continuing to love both.
6. I really wish this whole 'adult' thing wasn't so stressful. I mean, I want to grow up and have a job and and and and and, but that can't be done without the j-o-b. I feel like I am stuck in a parallel universe of ''hi, I'm 22, and yes I live at my parents house still because I'm trying to be my own person, but I haven't found the right fit yet''. Not a horrible universe, but something that is less fun than, you know, preparing for my classes in the fall...
7. So many people say "Don't worry, I got hired 2 days before school!"
That makes me worry a little bit!!!! Yes, you have a job but you do not have a house, or plans for the kids, or anything!! I'm a planner in that sense, and I like to know what's going on. That said, I would be perfectly happy getting hired two days before school starts. I just want to be a part of a staff and have some kids and show them the ways of the world. :)
This is not all overly exciting, I know. But I do think about teaching on a totally regular basis. I want to be in the classroom so bad that I think I might die if I can't be. OK. That was a bit of an exaggeration. But honestly, I find myself thinking about my classroom or my students at least once a day, which is a little bit silly as neither one of those exist. (YET).
But seriously, if this doesn't work out...oh hey colorado rockies....need some help? :)
Peace and love and more writings to come on a more than regular basis :)
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
my blog
I am tired.
I have no time to write like I want to.
Here is your blog post, Kurtiss. Now you may shut up.
:)
I have no time to write like I want to.
Here is your blog post, Kurtiss. Now you may shut up.
:)
Friday, March 27, 2009
and....so it goes
I feel like it has been practically a millennium since I've written in here last, so I am going to spend some time this morning writing. Seems like I get the chance to catch up in here once in every while, and although I don't always take advantage, today I shall.
I've done a fair amount of reflective writing for my seminar class. Which, I'm not really sure is a 'class' so much as me writing reflectively on what they want me to write on and then getting little feedback. I did a little prodding with my professor, and I now hear back from him a little more which is perfect. He's helping me with my resume today and I'll get to meet him face to face which is pretty cool :)
I feel like I have a ton of stuff to do all the time. ALL THE TIME. I love it, but I feel as if I am running after something and each time I get close to grabbing hold, it escapes and I am still running. In fact, I am pretty sure that this student teaching thing has allowed me to run, at least in my mind, seventeen marathons. They tell us that it will take that much time and energy...but do we (I) believe them? No. Of course not.
Things I've learned recently:
1. Spring Parent teacher conferences suck. In seven and a half hours I had approximately twelve parents. TWELVE. I have about 120 students. TWELVE!! And only two parents who actually had issues that their kid needed help with. I really enjoyed talking to all the parents that came, but I wish that either more came or we didn't have them... apparently fall conferences are better - we shall see (hopefully) next year :)
2. Coaching eases my mind. This is something I knew, but didn't KNOW. If that makes sense. I've always loved coaching and working with kids on the lacrosse field, but I've never been teaching at the same time. The amount of stress I feel has pretty much melted since I started coaching again (which is funny because I have less time...). I've also loved getting to work with a few of my students outside of the classroom. We've built a better connection and I have been able to see that good relationships formed in the classroom can translate onto the field and vice versa.
3. I never get enough work done when I'm supposed to.
This is a problem. I am working on it. Sigh.
4. SET is a great game to play with kids. I've got a student who comes in continually to try and beat me, and he brings his pals, and we work on his brain skills...but he doesn't know it :) haha.
5. I suppose that since I'm supposed to be working on my sophomore project I'll get to that now.
:)
I've done a fair amount of reflective writing for my seminar class. Which, I'm not really sure is a 'class' so much as me writing reflectively on what they want me to write on and then getting little feedback. I did a little prodding with my professor, and I now hear back from him a little more which is perfect. He's helping me with my resume today and I'll get to meet him face to face which is pretty cool :)
I feel like I have a ton of stuff to do all the time. ALL THE TIME. I love it, but I feel as if I am running after something and each time I get close to grabbing hold, it escapes and I am still running. In fact, I am pretty sure that this student teaching thing has allowed me to run, at least in my mind, seventeen marathons. They tell us that it will take that much time and energy...but do we (I) believe them? No. Of course not.
Things I've learned recently:
1. Spring Parent teacher conferences suck. In seven and a half hours I had approximately twelve parents. TWELVE. I have about 120 students. TWELVE!! And only two parents who actually had issues that their kid needed help with. I really enjoyed talking to all the parents that came, but I wish that either more came or we didn't have them... apparently fall conferences are better - we shall see (hopefully) next year :)
2. Coaching eases my mind. This is something I knew, but didn't KNOW. If that makes sense. I've always loved coaching and working with kids on the lacrosse field, but I've never been teaching at the same time. The amount of stress I feel has pretty much melted since I started coaching again (which is funny because I have less time...). I've also loved getting to work with a few of my students outside of the classroom. We've built a better connection and I have been able to see that good relationships formed in the classroom can translate onto the field and vice versa.
3. I never get enough work done when I'm supposed to.
This is a problem. I am working on it. Sigh.
4. SET is a great game to play with kids. I've got a student who comes in continually to try and beat me, and he brings his pals, and we work on his brain skills...but he doesn't know it :) haha.
5. I suppose that since I'm supposed to be working on my sophomore project I'll get to that now.
:)
Saturday, February 28, 2009
wow. so. long time...no write
So I'm pretty sure it has been beyond an eternity since I last wrote (at least in here)...time has been flying rapidly as of late...at least when it comes to getting things done. My mind today is functioning more like a list, so I'm going to write that way today - even if that seems odd. So in the last month or so, here is a list of the things I've learned and thought about...hopefully none are a repeat of the last post :)
1. I have no idea what to do with the special needs girl in my class. I wish that while at CSU we would have been forced to take a class - or spend part of a class on actually working with students that have special needs. She is nice, and functions rather highly...but I get uncomfortable when I don't understand what she needs, and also when I feel like I'm not meeting those needs. I do the best that I can, and I make sure to talk with the women who are working with her in the resource room, but I still feel like I would handle her better day to day if I had spend some time with special needs kids before. At this point, I would encourage ANYONE who is going to be a teacher to work with some special needs kids...it will no doubt come in handy in the future.
2. My US class is difficult. Oh. So. Difficult. They are lethargic and don't respond to much of anything, so it has been a challenge to say the least. I think I am finally getting the hang of some things though as last week all but FOUR kids had a rough draft for me...which was absolutely amazing. Usually, there would be less than half. Small victories!!
3. February is, no doubt, the hardest month on kids. It is cold. They're tired of being cold, they're tired of being in school, their sport is just ending/starting and they really just need some time off. I made cupcakes. It seemed to help - as did some of the activities we did in class...rapping about the French Revolution for example.
4. Lacrosse season has started...and although it makes me have less time to work, I am so far ahead of where I thought I would be as far as energy. The sport (as it usally does) has taken my sprit and lifted it up, and I have been able to become more confident in my classroom because of it. Also, the more I think about it, the more I notice that it is the lacrosse coaching that I've done that has allowed me to feel so comfortable in the classroom without being in one. It has been a little bit of an adjustment going from grass to desks, but a good one in many respects...and it's not like I am losing lacrosse :)
5. I want spring break as badly (if not more so) than the kids.
6. I need to re-organize. I am on the verge of having a psycho paper/lesson planning attack. Tomorrow I will go get organizing supplies and create a new lesson planning format for myself that will help. I will also print out calendars and sit down and put a time table on the future to help myself out.
7. I hate that I have to write papers for seminar. I feel like I'd be getting so much more out of talking with other students...I would be willing to drive to Fort Collins or Denver to do that instead of writing papers reflecting on what they want me to reflect on rather than what I want to reflect on. Sigh.
8. Building politics are interesting. I enjoy them...somewhat. I think that is mostly due to the fact that I like politics in general. I don't want to be part of them, that is for sure, but I do enjoy watching them develop...I'm pretty sure that is not normal.
9. I love our department meetings. My department always makes me laugh and I am so happy to be working with a group of men as I get along with men so much easier than I do women. It has really made the entire thing easier on me :)
10. I want a job now so I can stop thinking about it all the time!!!!!!!!
11. I love students. Even the ones that hate me and hate school. :) I like working with them and making things better for them...even if it is really hard, and even if it doesn't really work.
12. I'm tired. A lot of tired...and I don't think that it is going to stop. And you know what? That is okay with me. I love this job, more than I can ever describe in words.
13. I've found that having a strong friend or two really helps with the student teaching process. It is nice to have someone I can call every single day and talk about what I'm doing in the classroom. Without the help and guidance of my best friend, I would feel a lot more lost and frustrated. I think that it is important to recognize that the support of your friends is an invaluble resource when you're student teaching.
I think that is it for now. :)
1. I have no idea what to do with the special needs girl in my class. I wish that while at CSU we would have been forced to take a class - or spend part of a class on actually working with students that have special needs. She is nice, and functions rather highly...but I get uncomfortable when I don't understand what she needs, and also when I feel like I'm not meeting those needs. I do the best that I can, and I make sure to talk with the women who are working with her in the resource room, but I still feel like I would handle her better day to day if I had spend some time with special needs kids before. At this point, I would encourage ANYONE who is going to be a teacher to work with some special needs kids...it will no doubt come in handy in the future.
2. My US class is difficult. Oh. So. Difficult. They are lethargic and don't respond to much of anything, so it has been a challenge to say the least. I think I am finally getting the hang of some things though as last week all but FOUR kids had a rough draft for me...which was absolutely amazing. Usually, there would be less than half. Small victories!!
3. February is, no doubt, the hardest month on kids. It is cold. They're tired of being cold, they're tired of being in school, their sport is just ending/starting and they really just need some time off. I made cupcakes. It seemed to help - as did some of the activities we did in class...rapping about the French Revolution for example.
4. Lacrosse season has started...and although it makes me have less time to work, I am so far ahead of where I thought I would be as far as energy. The sport (as it usally does) has taken my sprit and lifted it up, and I have been able to become more confident in my classroom because of it. Also, the more I think about it, the more I notice that it is the lacrosse coaching that I've done that has allowed me to feel so comfortable in the classroom without being in one. It has been a little bit of an adjustment going from grass to desks, but a good one in many respects...and it's not like I am losing lacrosse :)
5. I want spring break as badly (if not more so) than the kids.
6. I need to re-organize. I am on the verge of having a psycho paper/lesson planning attack. Tomorrow I will go get organizing supplies and create a new lesson planning format for myself that will help. I will also print out calendars and sit down and put a time table on the future to help myself out.
7. I hate that I have to write papers for seminar. I feel like I'd be getting so much more out of talking with other students...I would be willing to drive to Fort Collins or Denver to do that instead of writing papers reflecting on what they want me to reflect on rather than what I want to reflect on. Sigh.
8. Building politics are interesting. I enjoy them...somewhat. I think that is mostly due to the fact that I like politics in general. I don't want to be part of them, that is for sure, but I do enjoy watching them develop...I'm pretty sure that is not normal.
9. I love our department meetings. My department always makes me laugh and I am so happy to be working with a group of men as I get along with men so much easier than I do women. It has really made the entire thing easier on me :)
10. I want a job now so I can stop thinking about it all the time!!!!!!!!
11. I love students. Even the ones that hate me and hate school. :) I like working with them and making things better for them...even if it is really hard, and even if it doesn't really work.
12. I'm tired. A lot of tired...and I don't think that it is going to stop. And you know what? That is okay with me. I love this job, more than I can ever describe in words.
13. I've found that having a strong friend or two really helps with the student teaching process. It is nice to have someone I can call every single day and talk about what I'm doing in the classroom. Without the help and guidance of my best friend, I would feel a lot more lost and frustrated. I think that it is important to recognize that the support of your friends is an invaluble resource when you're student teaching.
I think that is it for now. :)
Monday, January 26, 2009
and so it goes...
I am comfortable in my classroom(s).
I like the empty desks during my planning time knowing that they’ll soon be filled with students that I’ll have the opportunity to work with. I definitely have a lot to learn, but I can tell with barely any thought that this is what I want to be doing.
I have always (at least for the most part) enjoyed school…I’ve liked learning and often find various things fascinating – even outside of my own discipline. It always makes me laugh when people find out that I spend my days in the semi-out-of-control-universe of high school students and their “home turf” of their school. It’s easy for me. I find them completely endearing …I like the confident “I KNOW WHO I AM!” that many of them wear on their sleeve while harboring the “holy crap I’m afraid to be myself” in their little twisted up souls. Due to this – nothing is more rewarding for me than getting through to “that kid” who doesn’t respond well to other teachers or other people. I find myself trying to make a personal connection with each student – a challenge for sure, but something I think is quite important.
Students need adults to look up to who aren’t their parents and/or relatives. As teachers, I believe that we become a sort of safety net for the kids who need us.
Learning is a life-long process.
Learning to teach is an eternal process.
I am never going to be perfect in the classroom. No matter how hard I try, I will never reach every single kid…and that has to be okay. It is hard for me personally to make that okay, but somehow I have to remind myself that I will not be able to get through to every kid…for if I spend too much time focused in on one student, or a group of students I will miss far more.
That said - the biggest challenge to me is not the students, but the subject I chose to teach. I laugh every single time someone makes fun of me for teaching history… “couldn’t you teach something more interesting?” they say… “why would you ever want to teach THAT”. The answer is easy → I LOVE IT. I love the endless waves of people and stories that wrap the world up in timelines that cross and wind up and around themselves. However, the expanse of history makes it difficult at times to reach the students. With a bazillion choices of stories to share I have to process a number of them and try to figure out what is going to best reach my students. Plus, along with them I am always learning. I am always learning about history and my students and how to better give them a better education.
I am looking forward to the future with open arms and a big smile.
I like the empty desks during my planning time knowing that they’ll soon be filled with students that I’ll have the opportunity to work with. I definitely have a lot to learn, but I can tell with barely any thought that this is what I want to be doing.
I have always (at least for the most part) enjoyed school…I’ve liked learning and often find various things fascinating – even outside of my own discipline. It always makes me laugh when people find out that I spend my days in the semi-out-of-control-universe of high school students and their “home turf” of their school. It’s easy for me. I find them completely endearing …I like the confident “I KNOW WHO I AM!” that many of them wear on their sleeve while harboring the “holy crap I’m afraid to be myself” in their little twisted up souls. Due to this – nothing is more rewarding for me than getting through to “that kid” who doesn’t respond well to other teachers or other people. I find myself trying to make a personal connection with each student – a challenge for sure, but something I think is quite important.
Students need adults to look up to who aren’t their parents and/or relatives. As teachers, I believe that we become a sort of safety net for the kids who need us.
Learning is a life-long process.
Learning to teach is an eternal process.
I am never going to be perfect in the classroom. No matter how hard I try, I will never reach every single kid…and that has to be okay. It is hard for me personally to make that okay, but somehow I have to remind myself that I will not be able to get through to every kid…for if I spend too much time focused in on one student, or a group of students I will miss far more.
That said - the biggest challenge to me is not the students, but the subject I chose to teach. I laugh every single time someone makes fun of me for teaching history… “couldn’t you teach something more interesting?” they say… “why would you ever want to teach THAT”. The answer is easy → I LOVE IT. I love the endless waves of people and stories that wrap the world up in timelines that cross and wind up and around themselves. However, the expanse of history makes it difficult at times to reach the students. With a bazillion choices of stories to share I have to process a number of them and try to figure out what is going to best reach my students. Plus, along with them I am always learning. I am always learning about history and my students and how to better give them a better education.
I am looking forward to the future with open arms and a big smile.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Inaugural thoughts
Thoughts on an Inauguration for the ages…
I am 22 years old, and I have been fortunate (or, unfortunate depending on how you look at it – or depending on the event) to experience a lot of history as time travels on.
This early week in January 2009, I have been spending time in Washington DC to see the Inauguration of President Obama. Yesterday was the big day, and began at 3 am – with an hour walk to the line we were directed to. After waiting in line for several hours (three hours…in 20 degree weather with 70% humidity. Humid cold is not nearly as nice as dry cold…and all the people I met here did not notice that there was any humidity…ha. It is hard to explain that the cold is biting like a piranha that has been unable to eat for 17 years…) we discovered that the line we were standing in was for the parade and not the line for the National Mall – which was disappointing and somewhat frustrating since we’d been directed there after asking a police officer where to go … but decided that we had to go in so at least we would be in SOMEWHERE. They let in about 30 people per line through the security checkpoint at a time– and I was mostly ready to get out into the sun as we’d been in a tunnel of sorts. The line moved at a snail’s pace at best – so I was thrilled we were generally in the front of the line.
During this time – several spontaneous things happened….my favorite by far being the sudden break out in the song “Lean on Me” by the crowd. Mixed together between the barriers were people of all different colors, flavors, and shapes. I had to pause and reflect on the progress of our nation in the last 50 years. The laughter that filled the concrete tunnel following the end (or the “we can’t remember any more words to the song…) was completely joy filled and the electricity that it created was absolutely amazing – buzzing with excitement for a huge step forward.
Throughout this week, I have been fortunate enough to see such speakers as Colin Powell and Al Gore as well as some political hotshots and the poet laureate of the United States. Each and every one of the expressed their excitement for the coming generation – for my generation. Being into history I’ve already drawn parallels to JFK – and the Reagan years…but just the same is was wonderful to experience the feeling of excitement that the “outgoing” generation feels for us. It gives me confidence in the ability of the millennials to lead not only our nation, but our world into the future. A resounding reminder in the American promise of an ever better tomorrow…and the responsibility to provide that for the generations to come.
While dealing with the almost deadly piranha cold and the ever changing mood of the crowd – I found my mind wandering endlessly to the words of yesterday that moved and inspired generations, allowing our country to continually make progess. As I was reciting pieces of various speeches in my mind (crazy, I know, thanks for reminding me …) my gaze fell on an old African American woman. I immediately felt extremely lame for complaining about the cold because if an 80 year old woman can deal with it, then I should obviously be able to…this, however, did not help my skin’s toughness toward the bitter outside cold. Upon searching her eyes I was able to discover a deep joy coupled with relief. I thought for a moment that standing not five feet from me is a woman who had, at least in some way, EXPERIENCED Jim Crow…who had perhaps fought for her freedom with her people…freedom that “existed” but was not ‘in practice’ so to speak. My heart grew and swelled knowing that, although discrimination still exists in our nation it is on its way out. To this I say -- It’s about time!
Eventually we made it through the checkpoint (where thousands of people grumbled about the loss of their water bottles and bags that they had been told not to bring…), where we ended up with an absolutely exquisite view of the Capital – missing speakers and a decent view of a jumbo-tron …but wonderful just the same. I met and spoke with a man who was from LA and we discussed the massive amount of joy we were feeling for a turn over of power as well as a turn over in generation. During the time of Kennedy and King, there is a decent to good chance that Keith and I would not have been able to hold that conversation as he is African American. Watching the ceremony take place was a life-changing moment and although there was no sound and little picture, I walked out feeling changed, inspired, and proud of my country.
In my mind, there is a passage from a 1967 Martin Luther King Jr. speech (Where do we go from here?) that resonates with me as we continue to push forward for a better, stronger, more equal and free United States.
“And I must confess, my friends , that the road ahead will not always be smooth. There will still be rocky places of frustration and meandering points of bewilderment. There will be inevitable setback here and there. And there will be those moments when the buoyancy of hope will be transformed into the fatigue of despair. Our dreams will sometimes be shattered and our ethereal hopes blasted. We may again, with tear drenched eyes, have to stand before the bier of some courageous civil rights worker whose life will be snuffed out by the dastardly acts of bloodthirsty mobs. But difficult and painful as it is, we must walk on in the days ahead with an audacious faith in the future…”
-Martin Luther King Jr. August 16, 1967
One last thought for now…
Proof that the world has changed can be found in the writing of our youth…in my world history class we had a discussion about leaders through their journal. They were not only to identify the great traits of a leader, but to articulate who they thought was the greatest leader of all time. Although there were a few repeats – Jesus, FDR, Hitler, and Queen Elizabeth … no other person had the massive amount of “votes” so to speak than MLK. My students are overwhelmingly white…and I think to myself…we have come so far – so so so far in 50 years.
I am 22 years old, and I have been fortunate (or, unfortunate depending on how you look at it – or depending on the event) to experience a lot of history as time travels on.
This early week in January 2009, I have been spending time in Washington DC to see the Inauguration of President Obama. Yesterday was the big day, and began at 3 am – with an hour walk to the line we were directed to. After waiting in line for several hours (three hours…in 20 degree weather with 70% humidity. Humid cold is not nearly as nice as dry cold…and all the people I met here did not notice that there was any humidity…ha. It is hard to explain that the cold is biting like a piranha that has been unable to eat for 17 years…) we discovered that the line we were standing in was for the parade and not the line for the National Mall – which was disappointing and somewhat frustrating since we’d been directed there after asking a police officer where to go … but decided that we had to go in so at least we would be in SOMEWHERE. They let in about 30 people per line through the security checkpoint at a time– and I was mostly ready to get out into the sun as we’d been in a tunnel of sorts. The line moved at a snail’s pace at best – so I was thrilled we were generally in the front of the line.
During this time – several spontaneous things happened….my favorite by far being the sudden break out in the song “Lean on Me” by the crowd. Mixed together between the barriers were people of all different colors, flavors, and shapes. I had to pause and reflect on the progress of our nation in the last 50 years. The laughter that filled the concrete tunnel following the end (or the “we can’t remember any more words to the song…) was completely joy filled and the electricity that it created was absolutely amazing – buzzing with excitement for a huge step forward.
Throughout this week, I have been fortunate enough to see such speakers as Colin Powell and Al Gore as well as some political hotshots and the poet laureate of the United States. Each and every one of the expressed their excitement for the coming generation – for my generation. Being into history I’ve already drawn parallels to JFK – and the Reagan years…but just the same is was wonderful to experience the feeling of excitement that the “outgoing” generation feels for us. It gives me confidence in the ability of the millennials to lead not only our nation, but our world into the future. A resounding reminder in the American promise of an ever better tomorrow…and the responsibility to provide that for the generations to come.
While dealing with the almost deadly piranha cold and the ever changing mood of the crowd – I found my mind wandering endlessly to the words of yesterday that moved and inspired generations, allowing our country to continually make progess. As I was reciting pieces of various speeches in my mind (crazy, I know, thanks for reminding me …) my gaze fell on an old African American woman. I immediately felt extremely lame for complaining about the cold because if an 80 year old woman can deal with it, then I should obviously be able to…this, however, did not help my skin’s toughness toward the bitter outside cold. Upon searching her eyes I was able to discover a deep joy coupled with relief. I thought for a moment that standing not five feet from me is a woman who had, at least in some way, EXPERIENCED Jim Crow…who had perhaps fought for her freedom with her people…freedom that “existed” but was not ‘in practice’ so to speak. My heart grew and swelled knowing that, although discrimination still exists in our nation it is on its way out. To this I say -- It’s about time!
Eventually we made it through the checkpoint (where thousands of people grumbled about the loss of their water bottles and bags that they had been told not to bring…), where we ended up with an absolutely exquisite view of the Capital – missing speakers and a decent view of a jumbo-tron …but wonderful just the same. I met and spoke with a man who was from LA and we discussed the massive amount of joy we were feeling for a turn over of power as well as a turn over in generation. During the time of Kennedy and King, there is a decent to good chance that Keith and I would not have been able to hold that conversation as he is African American. Watching the ceremony take place was a life-changing moment and although there was no sound and little picture, I walked out feeling changed, inspired, and proud of my country.
In my mind, there is a passage from a 1967 Martin Luther King Jr. speech (Where do we go from here?) that resonates with me as we continue to push forward for a better, stronger, more equal and free United States.
“And I must confess, my friends , that the road ahead will not always be smooth. There will still be rocky places of frustration and meandering points of bewilderment. There will be inevitable setback here and there. And there will be those moments when the buoyancy of hope will be transformed into the fatigue of despair. Our dreams will sometimes be shattered and our ethereal hopes blasted. We may again, with tear drenched eyes, have to stand before the bier of some courageous civil rights worker whose life will be snuffed out by the dastardly acts of bloodthirsty mobs. But difficult and painful as it is, we must walk on in the days ahead with an audacious faith in the future…”
-Martin Luther King Jr. August 16, 1967
One last thought for now…
Proof that the world has changed can be found in the writing of our youth…in my world history class we had a discussion about leaders through their journal. They were not only to identify the great traits of a leader, but to articulate who they thought was the greatest leader of all time. Although there were a few repeats – Jesus, FDR, Hitler, and Queen Elizabeth … no other person had the massive amount of “votes” so to speak than MLK. My students are overwhelmingly white…and I think to myself…we have come so far – so so so far in 50 years.
thoughts about change
January 17, 2009
While reading journals turned in by some of my students, a few things became clear…
1. We need to learn how to correctly distinguish between “your” and “you’re” as well as “to”, “too”, and “two” and “there”, “their”, and “they’re.
2. We also need to learn about apostrophes…
3. Students don’t have a good grasp on current events and how or why they relate to the past.
As I’m a history teacher, I realize that I have a heightened sense of how current events reflect the past in SOME way. The world can not be the way it is without the influences of the past. I find that it is our responsibility to educate the future leaders of our nation on how we learn from the past. It is not my goal to teach kids millions of facts so that they may one day appear on Jepordy! and win thousands of dollars. My goals in history education are two fold:
I want kids to learn how to “do” history so that they’ll be successful in their future life whether it be college or not. If they are interested in the past (whatever subject matter it may be), they should be able to go find out about it…and be educated enough in the “how” of history to be successful.
I also hope that kids learn to appreciate that events that are happening today build on the past – and do not just appear out of nowhere. Although some events have more of an affect on ‘today’ than others, there is still a pulse running through the world today that beats with the decisions of past people.
While sitting in the Dallas airport today, I read and became consumed by a speech that Malcolm X gave during the American Civil Rights movement. Malcolm X is an extremely important figure in American history – but not one that I have ever studied much. If I dig into my brain to find the lessons I learned in middle and high school, they didn’t often include Malcolm X…and it wasn’t until today that I really allowed myself to dig into a piece of his work.
On November 10, 1963, Malcolm X delivered “A Message to the Grassroots”. The title in itself presents many parallels to events that are happening today. In a matter of days, Barack Obama will be inaugurated as the next United States President. Malcolm X’s message was about fighting – and the meaning of revolution. He questioned the ‘peacefulness’ of the African American population – citing that there were black men who went overseas to fight against ‘unknown’ enemies, but who were not fighting with that same vigor at home.
In 1963, the world was a different place, one that was full of hate and discrimination. I am extremely proud that our nation has taken a great step as a people. Looking out the window as I float above the sky, I can feel the excitement as almost the entire plane is full of people who are on their way to our nation’s capital to witness the inauguration of our first African American president. People of all genders, colors, and shapes sit together with eager smiles with the knowledge that the world (or at least, our world) is about to take a leap forward that perhaps eclipses putting a man on the moon.
On January 20th, I expect to stand among millions, with tears in my eyes. Although my ancestors were not enslaved, I am thrilled that our nation is strong enough and has grown enough since its conception that we are able to not only elect a president whose skin is a different color, but also to have joy in understanding the power of shedding some of the final pieces of chains that still bound members of our society.
How do students view this event? How do they connect it to the past?
I am fairly sure that ‘normal’ high school and middle school students are NOT actively trying to make connections to the past – so it is our responsibility as their teachers to help them see these connections so they can better understand the “history” that they are learning.
What better way to do that then through sources that show the deep pain of a group of people who were so repressed and beaten down for hundreds of years? Howard Zinn put together a book entitled “Voices of a People’s History” that includes an entire chapter that focuses on voices that illustrate the black uprising in the United States. Students need to learn and understand that it is the past that allows us to have a future.
“Nothing can stand in the way of the power of millions of voices calling for change.”
-Barack Obama
While reading journals turned in by some of my students, a few things became clear…
1. We need to learn how to correctly distinguish between “your” and “you’re” as well as “to”, “too”, and “two” and “there”, “their”, and “they’re.
2. We also need to learn about apostrophes…
3. Students don’t have a good grasp on current events and how or why they relate to the past.
As I’m a history teacher, I realize that I have a heightened sense of how current events reflect the past in SOME way. The world can not be the way it is without the influences of the past. I find that it is our responsibility to educate the future leaders of our nation on how we learn from the past. It is not my goal to teach kids millions of facts so that they may one day appear on Jepordy! and win thousands of dollars. My goals in history education are two fold:
I want kids to learn how to “do” history so that they’ll be successful in their future life whether it be college or not. If they are interested in the past (whatever subject matter it may be), they should be able to go find out about it…and be educated enough in the “how” of history to be successful.
I also hope that kids learn to appreciate that events that are happening today build on the past – and do not just appear out of nowhere. Although some events have more of an affect on ‘today’ than others, there is still a pulse running through the world today that beats with the decisions of past people.
While sitting in the Dallas airport today, I read and became consumed by a speech that Malcolm X gave during the American Civil Rights movement. Malcolm X is an extremely important figure in American history – but not one that I have ever studied much. If I dig into my brain to find the lessons I learned in middle and high school, they didn’t often include Malcolm X…and it wasn’t until today that I really allowed myself to dig into a piece of his work.
On November 10, 1963, Malcolm X delivered “A Message to the Grassroots”. The title in itself presents many parallels to events that are happening today. In a matter of days, Barack Obama will be inaugurated as the next United States President. Malcolm X’s message was about fighting – and the meaning of revolution. He questioned the ‘peacefulness’ of the African American population – citing that there were black men who went overseas to fight against ‘unknown’ enemies, but who were not fighting with that same vigor at home.
In 1963, the world was a different place, one that was full of hate and discrimination. I am extremely proud that our nation has taken a great step as a people. Looking out the window as I float above the sky, I can feel the excitement as almost the entire plane is full of people who are on their way to our nation’s capital to witness the inauguration of our first African American president. People of all genders, colors, and shapes sit together with eager smiles with the knowledge that the world (or at least, our world) is about to take a leap forward that perhaps eclipses putting a man on the moon.
On January 20th, I expect to stand among millions, with tears in my eyes. Although my ancestors were not enslaved, I am thrilled that our nation is strong enough and has grown enough since its conception that we are able to not only elect a president whose skin is a different color, but also to have joy in understanding the power of shedding some of the final pieces of chains that still bound members of our society.
How do students view this event? How do they connect it to the past?
I am fairly sure that ‘normal’ high school and middle school students are NOT actively trying to make connections to the past – so it is our responsibility as their teachers to help them see these connections so they can better understand the “history” that they are learning.
What better way to do that then through sources that show the deep pain of a group of people who were so repressed and beaten down for hundreds of years? Howard Zinn put together a book entitled “Voices of a People’s History” that includes an entire chapter that focuses on voices that illustrate the black uprising in the United States. Students need to learn and understand that it is the past that allows us to have a future.
“Nothing can stand in the way of the power of millions of voices calling for change.”
-Barack Obama
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
and...the ball starts rollin'
So today I only taught one class... as my other block had to go for scantron math testing. I'm really comfortable with the class I taught today. It is my most full, with about 34 students, but there is an energy, and I really click with the kids. I have to work hard to keep their attention and keep things moving, but once we get going, it goes well.
I've taught two 90 minute blocks, and so far....I think they've gone really really well. There are so many things I need to work on. Sometimes it is hard for me to not become disheartened as I really want to be the best person that I can be for the students. Whatever feelings I used to have about teaching being my calling have been completely reinforced with the past week of having students. Working with the kids leads me straight to a big smile, and a heart that knows I'm in the right place...which is one of the best feelings in the world...just below being loved. :)
Today we learned about China - I KNOW NOTHING! But, the lesson was successful, and I feel like the kids did well with it. They respond to me, and I've almost got all of their names down (thank god) and we're clicking well.
I need to catch up a little as I'm doing my lesson plans the night before, and it would be better for everyone if I could get it together a little faster/better. Hopefully I'll catch up to that train soon ... otherwise spring break is looking MIGHTY full of work...haha.
Things I have learned so far:
5:30 is REALLY early in the morning
Teachers hate bad leadership
Kids behave if you expect them to
You will answer the same question 500,000,000 times before the answer is finished
It means a lot to kids when you know WHO they are
I'm good at cracking into those kids who don't want to talk to anyone
I love this job
I need to make sure to establish the TIME PERIOD (duh!) when teaching
:)
I've taught two 90 minute blocks, and so far....I think they've gone really really well. There are so many things I need to work on. Sometimes it is hard for me to not become disheartened as I really want to be the best person that I can be for the students. Whatever feelings I used to have about teaching being my calling have been completely reinforced with the past week of having students. Working with the kids leads me straight to a big smile, and a heart that knows I'm in the right place...which is one of the best feelings in the world...just below being loved. :)
Today we learned about China - I KNOW NOTHING! But, the lesson was successful, and I feel like the kids did well with it. They respond to me, and I've almost got all of their names down (thank god) and we're clicking well.
I need to catch up a little as I'm doing my lesson plans the night before, and it would be better for everyone if I could get it together a little faster/better. Hopefully I'll catch up to that train soon ... otherwise spring break is looking MIGHTY full of work...haha.
Things I have learned so far:
5:30 is REALLY early in the morning
Teachers hate bad leadership
Kids behave if you expect them to
You will answer the same question 500,000,000 times before the answer is finished
It means a lot to kids when you know WHO they are
I'm good at cracking into those kids who don't want to talk to anyone
I love this job
I need to make sure to establish the TIME PERIOD (duh!) when teaching
:)
Sunday, January 11, 2009
change of a nation
As I am lying in my bed, my never ending mind continues on it's never ending quest to keep me awake at all hours of the night. Currently it is overflowing with ideas and thoughts - some of which must be dealt with immediately or I will spend hours lying in bed thinking about the same things for hours...which means no sleep ... which means a weary teacher.
In 8 days, we will have a new president. This is significant in itself. The MOST presidents that a high school student could have lived under is five. Considering that Clinton and Bush both held two terms - three different people now becomes the top number.
As someone who loves history and finds herself delving into books about the past on a regular basis, I often was frustrated when I was younger. I wanted to experience the "history" of tomorrow. My parents remember JFK's assassination - as well as MLK's. Not only that, but they lived through the Cold War, Man on the Moon, the Civil Rights movement, and the fall of the Berlin wall. My grandparents were alive during the tail end of the great depression, World War II , and Jackie Robinson's first game.
When I look into my 22 years of life, I find significant memories of "history" that I never really understood were to become the history of the future - such as Columbine. This time is different. I know that Obama's election and inauguration will change the face of this nation forever. No matter if you agree with the man's political views, it is impossible to not understand the importance of his election. 50 years ago, this nation was a different place...and I feel like we've come leaps and bounds since then. Do we have work to do? Of course. As teachers, our job requires us to help students understand the great wonders of our nation and the diversity that it encompasses. As HISTORY teachers, we need to make sure to catch the attention of our students when history is happening.
I will be attending the inauguration in 8 days. I couldn't be more excited about personally witnessing one of the big histories of my lifetime. I have the opportunity to listen to some amazing people speak, and wish that I could take my best history pals with me.
I have two thoughts for teachers (including myself).
1. Nominate kids for things that the Congressional Youth Leadership Council puts on. I was nominated by someone in high school and will be taking my second trip to DC becuase of it.
2. We need to help students connect the past to the future through our subject. History IS important...and although students don't need to remember everything, they do need to learn when significant things are happening around them.
My mother always laughed (and I think cringed a little) when I was insistant on saving massive amounts of newspapers. I guess I've always tried to capture the future history - and keep it a memory. What a memory the United States is about to put in the books... :)
In 8 days, we will have a new president. This is significant in itself. The MOST presidents that a high school student could have lived under is five. Considering that Clinton and Bush both held two terms - three different people now becomes the top number.
As someone who loves history and finds herself delving into books about the past on a regular basis, I often was frustrated when I was younger. I wanted to experience the "history" of tomorrow. My parents remember JFK's assassination - as well as MLK's. Not only that, but they lived through the Cold War, Man on the Moon, the Civil Rights movement, and the fall of the Berlin wall. My grandparents were alive during the tail end of the great depression, World War II , and Jackie Robinson's first game.
When I look into my 22 years of life, I find significant memories of "history" that I never really understood were to become the history of the future - such as Columbine. This time is different. I know that Obama's election and inauguration will change the face of this nation forever. No matter if you agree with the man's political views, it is impossible to not understand the importance of his election. 50 years ago, this nation was a different place...and I feel like we've come leaps and bounds since then. Do we have work to do? Of course. As teachers, our job requires us to help students understand the great wonders of our nation and the diversity that it encompasses. As HISTORY teachers, we need to make sure to catch the attention of our students when history is happening.
I will be attending the inauguration in 8 days. I couldn't be more excited about personally witnessing one of the big histories of my lifetime. I have the opportunity to listen to some amazing people speak, and wish that I could take my best history pals with me.
I have two thoughts for teachers (including myself).
1. Nominate kids for things that the Congressional Youth Leadership Council puts on. I was nominated by someone in high school and will be taking my second trip to DC becuase of it.
2. We need to help students connect the past to the future through our subject. History IS important...and although students don't need to remember everything, they do need to learn when significant things are happening around them.
My mother always laughed (and I think cringed a little) when I was insistant on saving massive amounts of newspapers. I guess I've always tried to capture the future history - and keep it a memory. What a memory the United States is about to put in the books... :)
Gearing up for the first FULL week...
I'm not sure how it is possible to learn so much in so little time...but I really have. I've had the opportunity to teach four 50 minute classes and two 90 minute blocks. The timing etc went really well for the blocks, which I was pleased about.
But, here I sit...knee deep in Tokugawa era Japanese history trying to figure out the best way to present it to my students. I haven't had these kids yet, so we'll see how it goes. I miss the comfort of not having my "own" kids...but enjoy the freedom of having my "own" kids. Tomorrow I must brave the copy room - which makes me nervous too... I have had the opportunity to learn (and witness) all of the ways that it breaks. Ha ha ha. I am afraid of the copier.
I did some grading this weekend which was good. I realized that I need to set standards for myself BEFORE I create the assignment as I was reading through the questions and realized that I'm not sure what I was looking for - so how can I grade it? Haha. Oops. I think that I probably learned about that somewhere along the line, but obviously forgot it.
On the upside...I LOVE this job. I'm still new at it so I have a lot of butterflies and questions still, but I really think that this is going to be a great fit. I wish there was an easier way to go about things than falling on my face, but I am skilled at that...so I guess it doesn't matter :)
I leave for the presidential inauguration on Saturday morning, and I am thankful for the opportunity to attend as well as to help my students understand what is going on - and how important this particular inauguration is in the span of history.
That's all for now. I best get back to my activities etc. for tomorrow...
:)
But, here I sit...knee deep in Tokugawa era Japanese history trying to figure out the best way to present it to my students. I haven't had these kids yet, so we'll see how it goes. I miss the comfort of not having my "own" kids...but enjoy the freedom of having my "own" kids. Tomorrow I must brave the copy room - which makes me nervous too... I have had the opportunity to learn (and witness) all of the ways that it breaks. Ha ha ha. I am afraid of the copier.
I did some grading this weekend which was good. I realized that I need to set standards for myself BEFORE I create the assignment as I was reading through the questions and realized that I'm not sure what I was looking for - so how can I grade it? Haha. Oops. I think that I probably learned about that somewhere along the line, but obviously forgot it.
On the upside...I LOVE this job. I'm still new at it so I have a lot of butterflies and questions still, but I really think that this is going to be a great fit. I wish there was an easier way to go about things than falling on my face, but I am skilled at that...so I guess it doesn't matter :)
I leave for the presidential inauguration on Saturday morning, and I am thankful for the opportunity to attend as well as to help my students understand what is going on - and how important this particular inauguration is in the span of history.
That's all for now. I best get back to my activities etc. for tomorrow...
:)
Monday, January 5, 2009
Day One... :)
So.
I survived!
After a minor altercation at the gate to get on base - I made it to school. I got to meet and "re" meet a lot of the staff and get comfortable in my new surroundings. I handed over the CSU packet to my cooperating teachers and worked on some unit stuff.
I don't get keys which is OK, and I now have a badge that should allow me to get on base without having to call the school every morning (but wouldn't THAT be fun??!).
I'm really excited. A lot of my nerves have fallen off from last night to tonight. I'm thankful that we have several days without students as it is giving me a lot of time to plan and process which is really nice...but at the same time I'm rearing to go.
I'm looking forward to tomorrow...and all the other tomorrows.
I survived!
After a minor altercation at the gate to get on base - I made it to school. I got to meet and "re" meet a lot of the staff and get comfortable in my new surroundings. I handed over the CSU packet to my cooperating teachers and worked on some unit stuff.
I don't get keys which is OK, and I now have a badge that should allow me to get on base without having to call the school every morning (but wouldn't THAT be fun??!).
I'm really excited. A lot of my nerves have fallen off from last night to tonight. I'm thankful that we have several days without students as it is giving me a lot of time to plan and process which is really nice...but at the same time I'm rearing to go.
I'm looking forward to tomorrow...and all the other tomorrows.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Goals and such
So, since tomorrow is the big day, and I tend to be a fairly big goal-setter, I decided that it be appropriate to set some for my semester of student teaching...so here they are (in no real order).
1. Control the Classroom
This may seem somewhat obvious, but I think it is important for me to focus on. I'll be spending the rest of my life with groups of students under my control, and I think that we'll all be happier if I can manage the room. Am I worried about this? Not really. I have always done fine with my lacrosse girls (although that is always on a FIELD and not in a CLASSROOM). Some of my friends have asked me how my smallness changes the way I manage the classroom with all of the "big" high school kids, and my answer is always that it doesn't. Just because I am a small person doesn't mean that I don't have a big voice and a big presence. I will not stand for cell phones...that I can tell you right now.
2. Never stop being creative.
So far, whenever I get to work in the classroom (i.e. have my own lesson) I have worked really hard to make it fun and creative. I don't see this stopping as it is one of my favorite things to do ever - but just to make sure it doesn't, I'm setting it as a goal too. Kids deserve teachers who are excited about the subject that they're teaching and assignments/projects that are more fun and useful than the typical "take notes, take test" approach.
3. Find my teacher self.
I enjoy being in the classroom, but I have yet to have an every-day opportunity to work with kids. This is it, and I am stoked. I want to find out through this semester what I really want to be like in the future. Although we're always changing as people and as teachers, I hope to find a good grasp on who I am in the classroom and be able to share that when I'm getting ready for jobs.
4. Bring art and music into the classroom.
Art and music are an important part of culture, and although students are not in a 'culture' class, history and culture are completely intertwined. Also, music and art are things that they UNDERSTAND right now...so it will be easy for them to relate to. I think that it is imperative that kids learn to connect to the past, and I think this is one of the best modes to do so.
5. Keep reading and keep writing.
I love to write, both academically (no matter how much I whine about it, I love it) and personally. However, I often get bogged down with "other" things and forget to make time to write. Writing allows me to be reflective, which I think is a HUGE part of becoming a good teacher. I plan to keep this blog going as a space that will let me think no matter how small or how short. I also love to read, and even if it is a few pages a day, I should be reading something that I WANT to read.
6. Balance!
When I was in high school I did the works - honors classes, band, sports, etc. Since I've been at CSU, there haven't been as many things going on at one time as there were when I was in high school and I think that I've lost some of my ability to balance some. I want to get this back...I'll be coaching and teaching (something that I plan to do together forever) and it will take me a bit to get in the swing of things. I need to remember to make sure that I make time for my personal things too - as they are important to me AND they'll help to keep me sane.
7. Get back in shape.
This may not seem school related, but it really is. I always feel better about myself when I'm in good physical shape. The better I feel the better teacher I can become. This does not mean that I have to be ready to compete in the olympics, but a little bit 'o running would do me good. Yoga is good to clear my mind as well (something I think I'm going to need to work on so I can, you know, sleep).
8. Ask for help when I need it.
This can be really hard for me sometimes...not all the time, but sometimes I'm really stubborn about stuff and I need to stop that. I'm going to need a lot of help - from my friends and family as well as peers and collegues. I need to break down my wall and ask for help when I need it...I am not supposed to be able to do everything right now....and the sooner I get that through my head, the better off I will be.
9. Eat Breakfast.
Breakfast is important. I have not eaten breakfast on a regular basis since I was in middle school and I think that I need to figure out how to start consuming food (ENERGY!) before I teach every day. It will be a difficult routine for me to get into, although I think important.
10. Keep my spaces clean.
So, I tend to have issues keeping stuff clean - my room, my car, my desk, my email box, you know...everything. I don't LIKE to be that way, I just sort of am. I've decided that I don't want to be that way anymore, and with so many other changes going on, it seems to make sense to get on top of that now...probably easier than later.
I suppose that is it for now. There are more than that, but these are the big ones...and since soemone is reading this, I expect you to help me remember that I've set these. I think that I will in fact write these out and post them on my mirror along with my mirror postings
(Imagine and Be a Hero Today)
My new life starts in less than 24 hours. Time to stop being a college kid and start being a teacher. (Insert deep breath here).
1. Control the Classroom
This may seem somewhat obvious, but I think it is important for me to focus on. I'll be spending the rest of my life with groups of students under my control, and I think that we'll all be happier if I can manage the room. Am I worried about this? Not really. I have always done fine with my lacrosse girls (although that is always on a FIELD and not in a CLASSROOM). Some of my friends have asked me how my smallness changes the way I manage the classroom with all of the "big" high school kids, and my answer is always that it doesn't. Just because I am a small person doesn't mean that I don't have a big voice and a big presence. I will not stand for cell phones...that I can tell you right now.
2. Never stop being creative.
So far, whenever I get to work in the classroom (i.e. have my own lesson) I have worked really hard to make it fun and creative. I don't see this stopping as it is one of my favorite things to do ever - but just to make sure it doesn't, I'm setting it as a goal too. Kids deserve teachers who are excited about the subject that they're teaching and assignments/projects that are more fun and useful than the typical "take notes, take test" approach.
3. Find my teacher self.
I enjoy being in the classroom, but I have yet to have an every-day opportunity to work with kids. This is it, and I am stoked. I want to find out through this semester what I really want to be like in the future. Although we're always changing as people and as teachers, I hope to find a good grasp on who I am in the classroom and be able to share that when I'm getting ready for jobs.
4. Bring art and music into the classroom.
Art and music are an important part of culture, and although students are not in a 'culture' class, history and culture are completely intertwined. Also, music and art are things that they UNDERSTAND right now...so it will be easy for them to relate to. I think that it is imperative that kids learn to connect to the past, and I think this is one of the best modes to do so.
5. Keep reading and keep writing.
I love to write, both academically (no matter how much I whine about it, I love it) and personally. However, I often get bogged down with "other" things and forget to make time to write. Writing allows me to be reflective, which I think is a HUGE part of becoming a good teacher. I plan to keep this blog going as a space that will let me think no matter how small or how short. I also love to read, and even if it is a few pages a day, I should be reading something that I WANT to read.
6. Balance!
When I was in high school I did the works - honors classes, band, sports, etc. Since I've been at CSU, there haven't been as many things going on at one time as there were when I was in high school and I think that I've lost some of my ability to balance some. I want to get this back...I'll be coaching and teaching (something that I plan to do together forever) and it will take me a bit to get in the swing of things. I need to remember to make sure that I make time for my personal things too - as they are important to me AND they'll help to keep me sane.
7. Get back in shape.
This may not seem school related, but it really is. I always feel better about myself when I'm in good physical shape. The better I feel the better teacher I can become. This does not mean that I have to be ready to compete in the olympics, but a little bit 'o running would do me good. Yoga is good to clear my mind as well (something I think I'm going to need to work on so I can, you know, sleep).
8. Ask for help when I need it.
This can be really hard for me sometimes...not all the time, but sometimes I'm really stubborn about stuff and I need to stop that. I'm going to need a lot of help - from my friends and family as well as peers and collegues. I need to break down my wall and ask for help when I need it...I am not supposed to be able to do everything right now....and the sooner I get that through my head, the better off I will be.
9. Eat Breakfast.
Breakfast is important. I have not eaten breakfast on a regular basis since I was in middle school and I think that I need to figure out how to start consuming food (ENERGY!) before I teach every day. It will be a difficult routine for me to get into, although I think important.
10. Keep my spaces clean.
So, I tend to have issues keeping stuff clean - my room, my car, my desk, my email box, you know...everything. I don't LIKE to be that way, I just sort of am. I've decided that I don't want to be that way anymore, and with so many other changes going on, it seems to make sense to get on top of that now...probably easier than later.
I suppose that is it for now. There are more than that, but these are the big ones...and since soemone is reading this, I expect you to help me remember that I've set these. I think that I will in fact write these out and post them on my mirror along with my mirror postings
(Imagine and Be a Hero Today)
My new life starts in less than 24 hours. Time to stop being a college kid and start being a teacher. (Insert deep breath here).
Thursday, January 1, 2009
um...really?
As the days approach and the moments left before I student teach begin to wane I find myself stressing over the classroom more than I have ever in my life. I love teaching and I love being in the classroom...I know for a fact that I am more comfortable in schools and with students than many of my peers who will also be student teaching this semester. I swear the butterflies in my stomach have turned into bats whose wings are going to tear out of my stomach. I have confidence in myself, which has the potential to go a long way, and I have to constantly remind myself that I will be okay.
How many teachers are there in the United States? About a zillion...and they all had to go through the experience that I'm heading into now - and although it makes me nervous, I know that I'll come out of it at the end having learned an immense amount from my match up teachers and from myself.
I don't feel like I'm ready.
But - those are the nerves talking.
Three days until the big day.
wow.
How many teachers are there in the United States? About a zillion...and they all had to go through the experience that I'm heading into now - and although it makes me nervous, I know that I'll come out of it at the end having learned an immense amount from my match up teachers and from myself.
I don't feel like I'm ready.
But - those are the nerves talking.
Three days until the big day.
wow.
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